sovereign over us.

This is the song that’s been playing on repeat around here lately.

Your plans are still to prosper
You have not forgotten us
You’re with us in the fire and the flood
You’re faithful forever, perfect in love
You are sovereign over us

Even what the enemy means for evil
You turn it for our good
You turn it for our good, and for your glory
Even in the valley you are faithful
You’re working for our good
You’re working for our good, and for your glory

surely we can change.

When all the love in the world

Is right here among us

And hatred too

And so we must choose

What our hands will do

Where there is pain

Let us bring grace

Where there is suffering

Bring serenity

For those afraid

Let us be brave

Where there is misery

Let us bring them relief

And surely we can change

Surely we can change

Oh surely we can change

Something

jesus, friend of sinners.

I heard this on the radio today, and can't get it out of my head. Especially this line:

Jesus, friend of sinners, break our hearts for what breaks yours

never once.

I've been doing a lot of walking outside, giving myself and the dogs some exercise and enjoying the weather and my proximity to downtown Frederick. Yesterday I walked to the grocery store, just because I could.

I've been listening to worship music on Pandora, and ever since I heard this one, I haven't been able to get it out of my head. I love the conviction of it.

Standing on this mountaintop 

Looking just how far we've come 

Knowing that for every step 

You were with us 

Kneeling on this battle ground 

Seeing just how much You've done 

Knowing every victory 

Is Your power in us 

Scars and struggles on the way 

But with joy our hearts can say 

Yes, our hearts can say 

Never once did we ever walk alone 

Never once did You leave us on our own 

You are faithful, God, You are faithful 

Scars and struggles on the way 

But with joy our hearts can say 

Never once did we ever walk alone 

Carried by Your constant grace 

Held within Your perfect peace 

Never once, no, we never walk alone 

Never once did we ever walk alone 

Never once did You leave us on our own 

You are faithful, God, You are faithful 

Every step we are breathing in Your grace 

Evermore we'll be breathing out Your praise 

You are faithful, God, You are faithful 

You are faithful, God, You are faithful

abstract art.

So after we finished the melted crayon art, and while Jacob was working on his own abstract masterpiece, I decided to make something a little abstract of my own.

My favorite colors are blues, especially the ones with a bit of green in them, like aqua, teal, and turquoise (which is why both the kitchen and bathroom are a similar color). So I stuck with those kinds of colors, and just fingerpainted them onto my canvas.

I'm also a big fan of words and quotes and lyrics, so I knew I wanted to incorporate that. This is also part of another goal for the year, to make meaningful art for my house. I used words from the song I Am New by Jason Gray. It's a beautiful song about the things God says about us.

forgiven

beloved

hidden in Christ

made in the image of the Giver of Life

righteous

holy

reborn

remade

accepted

worthy

By the way, the video is also excellent, and I love the art is created in it out of junk. Such a great meaning, isn't it?

10,000 reasons.

This song has been playing on repeat around here lately.

The sun comes up, it's a new day dawning

It's time to sing Your song again

Whatever may pass, and whatever lies before me

Let me be singing when the evening comes

...

And on that day when my strength is failing

The end draws near and my time has come

Still my soul will sing Your praise unending

Ten thousand years and then forevermore

all of me.

Baby Bowen is the son of Matt Hammitt, lead singer of Sanctus Real. He was born in 2010 with a congenital heart defect (you can see more here). Matt wrote the song below out of that experience, and as I listened to the words last night, I was struck by how applicable this is to loving any child struggling through hard circumstances - sickness, yes, but also those who come from situations of abuse and neglect.

I can't give you half my heart, and pray He makes you whole

You're gonna have all of me, you're gonna have all of me

Cause you're worth every falling tear, you're worth facing any fear

You're gonna know all my love, even if it's not enough

Enough to mend our broken hearts, but giving you all of me is where I'll start

made for more.

I keep going back to this song:

You're beautiful, you're beautiful

You were made for so much more than all of this

You're beautiful, you're beautiful

You are treasured, you are sacred, you are his

And this is the question - made for more than what?

For more than a life trapped in poverty?
For more than a life trapped in sin? In judgement and guilt and insecurity?
For more than my own ignorance?

Maybe that's what I need to be rescued from more than anything else:

From the selfishness and ingratitude that has me taking too many things for granted.
From the pride that has me thinking I've got this figured out
From the arrogance that makes me judge too many others for not doing their part
From the fear, that would keep me closing my eyes so I don't have to face truth. Because once you know, you have to do something.

for me.

Most Africans I've met love to sing and dance, and the kids at Hope House are no exception. Every day when I arrive, after greeting me, someone inevitably asks if I've brought my MP3 player (la musique, they say, while pointing to their ears to indicate the headphones). They pass it around and sometimes share it, with each one using one ear piece.

Thursday, during what was a more emotional day for me, I was listening to the music with one ear while Naomi (age 8) used the other ear piece. This song came on:

You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You are made for so much more than all of this
You're beautiful
You're beautiful
You are treasured, you are sacred, you are his
You're beautiful

I looked at her and wondered, does she know this is true? That she is beautiful and treasured in his sight? I even thought this would be a wonderful song to use in a video, with photos of the kids that I have come to love.

Then God tapped me on the shoulder. This isn't just a message for her, he said, it's a message for you. You are beautiful. You're my daughter and I love you. I have redeemed you, I have called you by name, and you are mine.

Sometimes I get so caught up in the ministry that I neglect the relationship. I'm so grateful that he is faithful to remind me.

we must go.

We must go
Live to feed the hungry
Stand beside the broken
We must go

Stepping forward
Keep us from just singing
Move us into action
We must go

he is risen!

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake!
Come and rise up from the grave

Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with him again
Come awake, come awake!
Come and rise up from the grave

past the wishing.

You've shown me my man of Macedonia
You're calling me further on
And I'm tired of saying "it's a nice idea
I wish it could be done"

I don't wish that I could go. . . I am going
I don't wish that I could be. . . I am being
I don't wish that I could do it. . . I am doing
By the grace of God I am doing

~ Sara Groves, Past The Wishing

mercies in disguise.

All the while, you hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops?
What if your healing comes through tears?
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know you're near?
What if trials of this life are your mercies in disguise?

this side.

I've spent a large part of my life desperately trying to control as much as I could. Even though I realized when I was young that I couldn't, that despite our best attempts there is still pain and people still die, I still tried. I expected life to turn out the way I wanted it to.

One day you'll see her and you'll know what I mean.

Take her or leave her she will still be the same.

She'll not try to buy you with her time.

But nothing's the same, as you will see when she's gone.

It's foreign on this side,

And I'll not leave my home again.

There's no place to hide

And I'm nothing but scared.

But life doesn't work that way, and I could only pretend for so long. I was afraid of the things that I didn't understand and couldn't control. What's more, I saw so many people around me who didn't seem to be paralyzed by fear, by change.

You dream of colors that have never been made,

You imagine songs that have never been played.

They will try to buy you and your mind.

Only the curious have something to find.

It's foreign on this side,

And the truth is a bitter friend.

But reasons few have I to go back again.

Thankfully, God loved me too much to let me hide behind my fear. The process of risking, of trying, or daring to believe there is something more and better isn't an easy one. Its painful, and there's no instruction manual or well-laid-out and clear path to take. But to my surprise, this flying-by-the-seat-of-my-pants thing? Its not comfortable, but its right. Every part of me resonates that this is the way God meant for us to live - not knowing the end, but trusting him with the next step.

Your first dawn blinded you, left you cursing the day.

Entrance is crucial and it's not without pain.

There's no path to follow, once you're here.

You'll climb up the slide and then you'll slide down the stairs.

It's foreign on this side,

But it feels like I'm home again.

There's no place to hide

But I don't think I'm scared.

That's why this song is the inspiration for my blog, because I'm not following the path that I intended, but I love it just the same.

the chasing song.

Well, I realize that falling down ain't graceful
But I thank the Lord that falling's full of grace
Sometimes I take my eyes off Jesus
And you know that's all it takes
~ The Chasing Song, Andrew Peterson

you are good.

Father, you are so good.

i want to be one of them.

I see the long quiet walk along the Underground Railroad
I see the slave awakening to the value of her soul

I see the young missionary and the angry spear
I see his family returning with no trace of fear

I see the long hard shadows of Calcutta nights
I see the sister standing by the dying man's side

I see the young girl huddled on the brothel floor
I see the man with a passion come and kicking down the door

I see the man of sorrow and his long troubled road
I see the world on his shoulders and my easy load

And when the Saints go marching in
I want to be one of them

~ When The Saints, Sara Groves

the night before christmas.

Empty manger, perfect stranger

About to be born

Into darkness, sadness, desperate madness

Creation so torn

We were so lost on earth

No peace, no worth, no way to escape

In fear, no faith, no hope, no grace, and no light

But that was the night before Christmas

And the world didn't know redemption was sweet and so strong

And the world didn't know salvation was writing a song

The night before Christmas

~ Brandon Heath, The Night Before Christmas

"Though the Witch knew the Deep Magic, there is a magic deeper still which she did not know. Her knowledge goes back only to the dawn of Time. But if she could have looked a little further back, into the stillness and the darkness before Time dawned, she would have read there a different incantation. She would have known that when a willing victim who had committed no treachery was killed in a traitor's stead, the Table would crack and Death itself would start working backwards."

~ C.S. Lewis, The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

sunday inspiration - christmas music.

This Sunday, I thought I'd share some of my favorite Christmas music. There are a lot of different songs in all kinds of different categories that I like (seriously, I should never be allowed to even walk by the Christmas music display at Target), but these are the whole CDs I find myself going back to over and over again.

-- 1 --

Behold The Lamb Of God, Andrew Peterson

Hands down, this is my favorite Christmas CD of all time (I've written about it twice before). Its the whole story of Jesus, from the time of Moses all the way through to Christ's birth. Its unlike any other Christmas CD I've ever heard before, and it never gets old. I can't even pick a favorite song - the only thing is seriously incredible. And the only thing better than listening to the CD is seeing it live in concert - its one of the highlights of Advent for me (there's a great review here).

-- 2 --

Peace On Earth, Casting Crowns

I love Christmas CDs that mix traditional songs with new ones, and this one does a great job of that. My favorite song is "I Heard The Bells On Christmas Day." This is one of those songs I've heard so many times, but it wasn't until I heard Mark Hall talk about it that I actually listened to the words and really understood them. It reminds me of a poem by Anne Bradstreet, "Upon The Burning Of Our House," I read for a college lit class.

-- 3 --

Bring Us Peace, Ginny Owens

This is another CD that has a wonderful mix of old and new songs. The very first song, "Christmas All The Time," is about dreaming as a child that Christmas would last all year long - I was hooked from that point.

Oh to celebrate our Savior's birth

By giving to the world from the fullness of our lives

God's good gifts to me taught me how to see

It can be Christmas all the time

-- 4 --

The Polar Express soundtrack

The first half of this CD contains songs from the movie, all of which never fail to make me sing along in the car because they're just fun. The second half is full of secular classics, like "White Christmas" (nobody sings that song like Bing Crosby).

-- 5 --

Victoria Secret

This is an odd choice, I know, and I don't like the cover - but I love the mix of songs of this two-disc set (notice a theme here?). Tyler Hilton does my absolute favorite rendition of "Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas," and Brian Setzer's "The Man With The Bag" and The Beach Boys' "Little Saint Nick" are just fun songs to sing along to. But my favorite song has to be "I Want An Alien For Christmas" by Fountains of Wayne:

-- 6 (a bonus) --

Christmas, Andy Gullahorn and Jill Phillips

This is a CD - I just picked it up at the Behold The Lamb Of God concert two days ago, but its rapidly becoming a favorite. Like the others on this list, there's a great mix of old and new songs, and their take on "Baby It's Cold Outside" (with new lyrics) is absolutely hilarious.

what love really means.

I think I love every song from JJ Heller that I've ever heard.

Who will love me for me?
Not for what I have done or what I will become
Who will love me for me?
‘Cause nobody has shown me what love, what love really means