Catching up

I'm generally feeling exhausted. I have so many things I want to get done over the next week (before leaving for Young Life camp), and it feels like there's never enough time to do them all. And I don't want to just dedicate myself to my to-do lists - I want to spend time with friends and family, too. Which makes things just a little more vague, at a time when I feel like I'm straining for clarity.

Dad's weight-loss surgery was yesterday, and things seemed to go pretty well. His liver is pretty small, which can be caused by his weight (apparently, fatty tissue can do more damage than alcoholism). The doctors did a biopsy, and depending on the results, may not be able to do the second weight-loss surgery that Dad wants.

I decided to forgo white-water rafting this summer for a trip out to Chicago. I'll spend some time there, then drive with friends to Homecoming (my five-year college reunion!), then back to Chicago for a couple more days. I'm excited, because I'll get to see all of my midwest friends, even though they're spread through three states.

We leave for camp a week from tomorrow, and to be honest, I'm not looking forward to it. I think it's because I'm overwhelmed with what I need to get done between now and then. And then, of course, camp isn't exactly relaxing. It's a lot of fun and very rewarding, but it's exhausting and hard work, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually - so it's not really a vacation. I think I need to get my heart in the right place.

I offered to babysit Jacob for most of the day tomorrow. Mom can't do it, as Dad will hopefully be home by then and she needs to be able to be with him. Katie has the day off, and has the opportunity to go to Kings Dominion with friends. She wasn't telling me because she wanted a babysitter, because she had resigned herself to the fact that she couldn't go. Which is probably why I offered in the first place, and because I get to spend time with Jacob, and because it's something I can give her that she will value.

I think she will value it, too, and does - otherwise, I would be kicking myself for being a doormat where my family is concerned. This is one thing that I'm vowing, though - I will not feel guilty about asking my family for help when I need it. I'm pretty independent, and don't need a lot, but give and take is what a family should be about.